Sexperience

6 posted so far

1. im glad i watched this show i wish there had been things like this for us ive never had a orgasum with a man i do mastabate though and can have an orgasum i think at the age of 41 i need to relax more after reading some of the ansewers on this wesite.”

   Posted by jane on 1st Apr at 12:55AM (flag as inappropriate)

2. I found through recent experientation I found that I have two different types of orgasm through clitoral stimulaton, one being stronger and more intense than the other, the other is still good but I 'squirt'. Ive never had an orgasm through penetrative sex and only a few times by oral. I think alot of it is psychological, and sometimes I worry too much and just hope my partner is enjoying himself.”

   Posted by claire on 31st Mar at 5:27PM (flag as inappropriate)

3. Ive been with my boyfriend for alomst 3 years now and i have never had an orgasam through penitrative sex only oral sex. The sex is nice but not sometimes it hurts or becomes uncomfortable which stops an orgasam developing. Is this normal?”

   Posted by Elizabeth on 11th Oct at 6:55PM (flag as inappropriate)

4. I have been going out with my boyfriend for 2 years and have never had an orgasm having been sexually active throughout this full time. I can reach a point where i feel like i am going to but somehow it just never happens for me. Is there some sort of psychological block that could prevent me from doing this? ”

   Posted by Nicole on 4th Oct at 3:12PM (flag as inappropriate)

5. im only young and when having sex it hasnt ever reached a climax like an orgasm. I dont know what this means or to be honest what to expect.”

   Posted by sophie on 30th Sep at 5:37PM (flag as inappropriate)

6. 
   I'm 51, and I'd like to comment on the orgasm issue in case it may help some young women out there to come to terms with their own sexuality rather faster than the thirty years it's taken me!

   My parents were very strict, and sex was a subject of shame in our house, as indeed was just having a normal body, which had to be covered up. As a result, as a highly sexed girl, I had many years of total misery and guilt.

   Basically their attitude meant I was massively insecure and scared of sex, so the first time I slept with a man, at the late age of 19, I spent three very mixed-up years thinking I was in love with him, despite it only ever having been a one night stand for him.

   I then worried constantly about adding to the number of guys I slept with (not even that many, certainly by today's standards!), and tried to justify each one as 'meaning something', which looking back on it puzzled them hugely!

   But my main point here is, until you are secure in yourself and relaxed about your body and your sexuality, you probably won't enjoy sex (or life!) as you should, and also you may well not come during sex. (They say lots of women actually never do come at all during the sexual act, by the way! You'd never guess from the articles in Cosmopolitan etc, would you?)

   What it's taken me most of 30 years to understand is that you are responsible for your own orgasm. It's not down to the guy.

   In 25 of those years I had only one true orgasm from sexual intercourse. I now believe that I was blocking my own responses by just not accepting that it's perfectly normal and healthy to be highly sexed (or indeed, not to be, of course). I was also trying too hard, both not relaxing for myself and always endeavouring to give the guy a good experience.

   It's a little-discussed fact, I feel, that there are several different kinds of orgasm for women. (I speak here of my own analysis; there may well be dimensions I have not experienced!)

   Firstly, there's a very basic type that you can give yourself with your fingers, in my case in about 30 seconds, sometimes four times a day, till I was about 27. (Many women seem to like vibrators, but they don't add a lot for me.)

   There are two aspects to this, also, intense vaginal and clitoral sensations, each feeling different.

   Then during sex there's what I once heard brilliantly described as 'the relief of tumescence', i.e. the genital tissues get very engorged and need the release that some describe as orgasm. It is an extremely pleasant sensation in your pelvic area, involving a pulsing movement of the muscles, but nothing like the real thing!

   What I'd call 'the real thing' is a sensational feeling which may start in the genital area but extends throughout your body, including into your mind/soul, that adds a whole new dimension to sex. I've only felt this in recent years and with one guy, the first and only one I've loved.

   I think the reason is that I finally let my guard down, with him, but also with myself, and allowed myself to be open to the intimacy of letting go completely.

   At its peak, this is a spiritual experience.

   I'm somewhat upset that it took me 30 years to attain this, but glad that I have experienced this incredible 'union of souls', which I know some people never do.

   Amazingly, my partner has the most fantastic orgasms of any guy I've ever known, which take over his whole body, not just the genital area, so that it actually goes into spasm - it's almost painful, he says - and I need to touch him very carefully for several minutes during and afterwards.

   The weirdest thing is, he and I are swingers, sometimes having sex with strangers, and this too can be a surreal experience when you and your partner are close. There's no jealousy, just relaxation and delight in seeing your partner happy. When he kisses me when another man is inside me, it isn't orgasmic, but it is a fantastically thrilling and satisfying sensation which is difficult to convey to other people...

   Perhap s I'd better quit while I'm ahead ;-) ! I wish all of you a happier and less agonised pre-menopausal sex life than my own!

   ”

   Posted by Cindy on 16th Sep at 10:00PM (flag as inappropriate)